ugh fuck my parents i asked for an apple and they got me some stupid fucking computer i am so frustrated how could they do this to me i just wanted a fucking apple i am starving jesus christ they cost like not even a dollar all they had to do was go to the fucking grocery store what the fuck happened
plot twist: santa actually brings you the naked celebrity you asked for and you have to awkwardly unwrap them in front of your entire family
But if they’re naked, what do you have to unwrap?
The wrapping paper?
Obviously they aren’t naked then. They’re wearing wrapping paper and then it’s just you being inappropriate with the decision to unwrap them in front of the family.
Aries - Selfish Prick
Taurus - Stubborn Asshole
Gemini - Annoying Attention-Whore
Cancer - Moody Jerk
Leo - Egotistical Douchebag
Virgo - Neurotic Bitch
Libra - Flaky Derelict
Scorpio - Obsessive Twat
Sagittarius - Awkward Fucktard
Capricorn -Greedy Emo
Aquarius - Perverted Psychopath
Pisces - Whiny Bimbo